Love Stinks (Yeah, Yeah…)

L-O-V-E

We talked a little bit about it in class today, so while we are on the subject, I figure I’d touch on it a little bit also. I found John’s take on love very amusing, but I also have to say I completely agree with it, pretty much 100%. It’s not as important as everybody claims it to be…or I should say certain kinds of love.

And before I get on a tangent, I would like to say first and foremost, I am not a cynical, bitter, person, when it comes to the subject of love, and would like everyone to keep in mind that my license plate does say “HugSum1” I’ve been told to “hug a tree,” and can really get very sentimental very easily. I love my family, I love my friends, and am lucky enough to have a handful that I keep very close to me; I have friends across the country that I have to say goodbye to multiple times a year, flip flopping my life when it comes to school, work, and home. I especially know what it feels like to miss someone, when there’s a gap from someone you can’t be with anymore. Love is considered abstract, but for me it’s never been hard to figure out. It’s everywhere. It’s a feeling of comfort, it’s genuinely wanting what’s best for others, it’s helping. Simply put, it’s caring. It’s a very easy concept I feel.

So when people are “looking for love,” or trying to find “the right person” or their “other half,” and aren’t satisfied until they find their “match,” I just find it all, no offense, but… stupid. Being “In Love,” what does that even mean?! It’s two completely different things really. One is love. The other is purely infatuation. When you’re in love you’re just infatuated, and you care about that person. Together. It’s unique, and special, I’ll grant it that, but I guess that’s my argument.

People who are on the search for their “soul mate,” are getting together with people they care about and maybe not infatuated with. What happens when somebody comes along and that fills that missing piece? That relationship is over. Or maybe they are completely infatuated with someone, but they don’t give a damn about the person themselves. That’s going to last for two seconds. And that’s just one person’s feelings. So really a situation when both parties feel the same exact way and everything is completely perfect on both ends, seems very unlikely, almost impossible. But let’s just say rare.

I’m going to be lame and quote a movie, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days actually. The quote goes something like “…People in lust want chocolate; People in Love want diamonds.” Because diamonds are rare. Blah blah, this isn’t new to anybody. Everybody believes that that “special someone” is rare to find, that's what's so alluring about it all. People argue if their “true love” even exists, (which I don’t by the way…) There’s probably many people who meet the “true love” criteria, but there are also many millions of times more people than that in this world. Finding those people is the tricky part.

So finally my point. If that situation were to ever present itself, then you can treat it with the specialty that it is. It’s not for everybody. And nobody really needs it. Nobody. Like I said love is everywhere, if you aren’t satisfied with that, then it’s clearly your hormones speaking. And, wow, I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but really, go hook up with somebody, and leave it at that! Maybe it shouldn’t be considered that big of a deal….....… Really, I don’t know if I completely agree with that idea, but I hope you sort of get my point…

Anyways, meanwhile, appreciate what you have. Many people in their love-crazed minds don’t pay attention to anything else. How many people regularly call home to their family? I’m guilty of not doing it, getting distracted with life in general. So it should start there. Send a friend a card just because. Give somebody a freaking hug. Hang with your friends. Live your life. And if that special someone happens to come around, consider yourself lucky and embrace the situation. But wait for that time, and be okay with it. Even if it doesn’t come, does it really have to be that big of a deal? Sure, it sounds wonderful. And sure, I love watching a good chick flick every now and again, and it warms my little heart. But it’s not real. It's not like it happens every day like they make it out to seem. You can't make it happen! Don’t you find it kind of strange that people plan to get married when they try to figure out their life? They plan to have a certain number or kids by a certain time frame. I find that very strange... It’s NOT a given, and you’ll probably find that you can’t make it be.

Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe everybody deserves love, and should give a go at it. Maybe I’m missing something in the trial and error department. Hell, maybe I’m the most naive here in thinking it should come naturally… Maybe everything I just described fits into the “meant to be” mentality, which is almost as bad as soul mates. (bleh!) I’ve argued with many people about this, and it’s always fun, but nobody ever agrees… Can anybody relate to this at all?

Anyways, when the opportunity presents itself, I figure it a great time to offer a different perspective...So please just let me leave you with a few requests…

Ahem,

1) Don’t force love upon yourself.

2) Don’t obsess.

3) Don’t commit when you shouldn’t, if anything it adds unnecessary hurt (to yourself and others) when there doesn't have to be any at all!

4) Meanwhile, as John said, live your life! There’s a whole world out there!!!

5) Embrace the love you have, (which is never hard to find…)

6) And lastly… Give somebody a hug :)

picture:

http://thesituationist.files.wordpress.com/2008/02/thing-called-love.jpg